My boss is an alcoholic. He almost destroyed himself 19 years ago because of his addiction to alcohol and cocaine. He got sober and remained that way for 19 years. Last fall he decided that it would be okay to have a glass of wine now and then. Since that time, he has been in three rear-ender accidents, totaled two of his cars, and is facing a drunk driving charge.
I have also noticed a decided difference in his personality. He alternates between Mr. Nice Guy and Mr. Bully
His wife phoned me at home at 7:00 a.m. when he was arrested for DUI . This morning my phone rang at 7:00 a.m. and his wife told me that he had been arrested last night for domestic violence; had bailed himself out and come back to the house and was again arrested for violation of a restraining order (which had issued automatically when he was arrested for DV). He is now sitting in jail with $100,000 bail. He is to be arraigned tomorrow morning at 8:30 a.m. His attorney is hoping for an OR (own recognizance) release. His wife is willing to drop all charges if he checks himself into a 30 day residential treatment program. He is not agreeable to this.
If he doesn’t go into a residential treatment program, I am afraid of receiving that third 7:00 a.m. phone call from his wife informing me that he has wrapped himself around a tree or killed someone else.
30 days doesn’t sound like a lot of help but it is better than nothing.
Nope He’s an attorney. Need a license to do that.
Holy Shit……where was the Secret Service when he was doing all this? God, sorry…..couldn’t resist comparing your alcoholic with my alcoholic in my life.
Well, to tell you the truth, don’t think the Secret Service cares about alcoholic attorneys.
Scooter Libby was there too? Nadia I’m sorry about your boss…..any chance you can find employment with a different attorney? Taking care of alcoholics is very draining.
Yep,it is extremely draining. Or as our Commander in Chief says, “It’s hard work,”
AA or any treatment program is not for those that need help…it is for those that WANT help. Sorry to be so blunt but I would start looking for another job. He’s not ready and if he was sober once he knows the drill. My advise is take care of yourself first, you cannot fix him.
I agree with alohaleezy. The guy can’t sustain this lifestyle without the help of his wife and you. Maybe the sudden stopping of that help would wake him up to reality and make him want to get better.
Remember, this is his problem – not yours. It’s up to him to learn how to make it in the world, and yours to take care of yourself. Yes, it’s a sad world we live in – you can’t save everybody so start with yourself. I’d be looking for another job – find a way out soon.
Nadia,
The comments you have received are among the best suggestions I would offer you. As a person in recovery from multiple substance abuse (17+ years) and having worked as a peer counselor for more than 10 years, I would also suggest that you find an alanon meeting and listen to what others in your situation are doing to help themselves.
I hope that you find some solutions to the issues that face you and that you find peace and comfort within yourself. The destruction that an addicted person perpetuates into the lives around them is devastating and as someone above posted, you must take care of yourself first.
May Great Spirit bless you and keep you safe and sane as you progress through this very difficult time in your life.