From former Arkansas Senator Dale Bumpers’s testimony on Bill Clinton’s behalf, during the Senate Impeachment Trial of 1999.
We are none of us perfect. Sure, you say, he should have thought of all that beforehand. And indeed he should. Just as Adam and Eve should have.
Just as you and you and you and you, and millions of other people who have been caught in similar circumstances, should have thought of it before.
And I say none of us are perfect.
I remember, Chaplain, the — the chaplain’s not here, is he?
(LAUGHTER)
That’s too bad. He ought to hear this story.
(LAUGHTER)
This evangelist was holding this great revival meeting, and at the close of one of his meetings he said, is there anybody in this audience who has ever known anybody who even comes close to the perfection of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ? Nothing. He repeated the challenge, and finally a itty bitty guy the in back of the audience kind of held up his hand, and he said, “You — are you saying you’ve known such a person? Stand up.”
He stood up, and he said, “Tell us, share it with us.
Who was it?” He said, “My wife’s first husband.”
Pray tell how you came across that.
I guess I need more coffee but I just don’t get the joke here. Or is it like a morality thing? Anyway if someone could explain, I’d sure appreciate it!
Pax
I didn’t get the point, if there is one, either–which is why I asked above.
Maybe it has something to do with Lieberman and the Democrats?? I don’t see how. If you have to explain a joke . . . .
This reminds me of the old joke about the guy who got stoned and, during the night, discovered the Secret Of The Universe! He feverishly fumbled around to find a scrap of paper and he Wrote It Down! The next morning, awaking from a long stupor, he had a dim recollection of a great revelation, so he looked around for the paper. He found it. And it said: “There is a funny smell in the room!”
Further down in the linked testimony of Bumpers, I found the following:
Ugh… it’s so sad how the complete opposite of that last line is now true… less than 5 years after the world stood united with America. Bush sure knows how to fuck things up!
Pax
The point is that no one is perfect, no one is perfect, that is, except for this guy’s wife’s first husband, which, no doubt, this poor sap is reminded of whenever he falls short of such perfection.
I believe John Kerry probably has his fill of this from Theresa HEINZ Kerry.
I took it another way – the guy is saying his wife’s first husband must have been Christlike to have put up with her.
It reminds me of the time on Oprah (I know) when she asked the audience what they would do if they knew they only had 6 months to live. One guy said he’d move in with his mother in law and then it would seem like the longest six months on earth.
could be a Protestant/Catholic thing. Just as Mel Gibson concentrates on the suffering of Christ, I concentrate on his positive example and ethical teaching. I’m pretty sure the joke is meant to highlight the first husband’s apparent faultlessness, not because divorced women are prone to praise their ex-husbands (although widowed women are) but because of the way the question was phrased.
I took it this way too. And I’m Catholic. Maybe Protestants see it a different way?
that the only person the guy knew of who was as perfect as Christ was the first husband his wife must have been comparing him with unfavourably. It’s a guy joke, I guess, and possibly a sexist one at that because it implies the wife nags at him..
I think I’m going to cry. Remember how good the news used to be, how delightful and interesting. It wasn’t that 73% of American voteded for Clinton but he was so interesting and harmless. Now all the news is bad.
The 73% that didn’t want Clinton impeached are easier to explain than one might expect what with all the religious fervor about. http://www.hoax-buster.org tells you why.
BC, if you are truly interested in contributing to this blog, I think you are more than welcome to do so.
However,if every comment you intend to leave here is only for the purpose of whoring your blog, please feel free to leave this place.
I fail to see what this comment has to do with the intended levity and the joke (however bad it may be.)
Consider this a verbal warning before the low ratings begin.