This is some really creative stuff the Pentagon is feeding us:
The most recent, and perhaps strangest, case of mishandling was documented on March 25, 2005, when a detainee complained to the guards that urine came through an air vent in his cell and “splashed on him and his Koran while he laid near the air vent.” According to Hood’s investigation, the guard who was responsible reported himself to his superiors and was reassigned to gate duty. The detainee was given a new uniform and Koran.
“The guard had left his observation area post and went outside to urinate,” according to a summary of the incident. “He urinated near an air vent and the wind blew his urine through the vent into the block.”
I have no snark sufficient to the task. It speaks for itself. I’m just glad they have finally admitted:
that soldiers and interrogators kicked the Muslim holy book, got copies wet, stood on a Koran during an interrogation
I doubt Newsweek will receive an apology.
.
The World held its breath, until finally the Pentagon investigation uncovers the TRUTH.
After three years of GITMO torture, a number of holiday flights out to Syria, Egypt and Uzbekistan, two detainees admitted today they flushed the Qu’ran themselves!
The guards at Guantánamo Bay only pissed on the Qu’ran, it has been confirmed.
I’m glad the Pentagon manages to frame info in a broad sense, into several acts for us poor souls, and the ignorant 1.3bn Muslims globally, can understand. I’m sure all problems between Christians and Muslims are just about solved.
Oui – Liberté – Egalité – Fraternité
Wind bad. Bad wind. Unpatriotic wind. Troublemaker wind. Atheist wind. Freedom-hating wind. …
I will offer here the same comment I made over at dKos to a similar, though far less eloquent, diary:
Remember when you could believe at least a few, small things that the government said?
if any Bush family members were in Guantanamo at the time — pissing in the wind would be par for the course among that long line of halfwits.
Bush family members I want to see at Guantanamo are the ones who will be there involuntarily, as long-term guests of a government that once again recognizes international law.
Having been cleaning bathrooms for years, and noticing how less frquent the task is when the house is male free, and some of the places I have had to scrub, I actually believe this poor man and his wayward shooting completely…
Me too. But, I don’t buy this story any more than I bought the WMD story.
It’s fiction, and poor fiction at that. It’s bullshit.
I think it’s possible that you can urinate outside the barracks and have the wind send it in the vent. I think it might even be considered a funny pastime for an 8th Grade boy.
I don’t think this explanation does anything to absolve the military over Koranic desecration, even if this incident did happen.
CAPTION: Hundreds of Bangladeshi Muslim women holding Korans participate in a protest in the capital Dhaka against the reported desecration of the Koran by U.S. troops in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba June 3, 2005. There have been protests in many Muslim cities over reports that U.S. military …
This photo makes me sick for a couple reasons:
I hate to see women forced to dress in the burka too!! BUT I have worked with colleagues (from Iran, Turkey, Pakistan and elsewhere) better educated and more feminist than me, and students more forthright and risque than me (and I’m Greek/Turkish) who chose to wear these clothes as a defining statement of who they are. Sometimes against family wishes.
I must admit most muslim women prefer less restriction than that, but there we go. It’s a funny old world.
The administration knows full well that its supporters don’t give a damn whether it’s a lie or a felony or outright murder as long as the administration sticks to its guns.
Convinced supporters of war know the guard pissed on the Koran. They think it’s swell. All they require from their chosen president is that he maintain the lie and with it their pride and desire to behave like winners. More than anything they want to come out on top — over lefties, over ayrabs, over all the people they resent.
Analysis, honesty and apologies are for suckers. So’s democracy, come to that. Think Rove doesn’t capitalize on this anger?
from the White House now for blaming them for the violence over the Coran story.
They can’t. Our soldiers didn’t flush the Koran down the toilet.
Several Muslim detainees flushed their Korans down the toilet.
The Pentagon said so.
Oh that’s right. Silly me!!!!
Yes. Must I remind you of the facts?!
LOL…no need to remind me…Scottie will do it for you!
There I was, minding my own business, dick in hand, peeing against the side of the Gulag. It was a beautiful afternoon. I watched a fat flotilla of cumulus clouds float across the Cuban sky as my bladder emptied, enjoying that feeling of All being Right with the World that comes with taking a good piss….When suddenly I realized my urine was splashing against an air vent.
“Hmm,” I said to myself, “I wonder if the air in this air vent is carrying flecks of my urine and splashing it on one of our guests here at the Gulag?”
Hurriedly zipping up I ran inside, following the twists and turns of the duct til finally I came to the cell where, sure enough, my urine was misting directly into the face of Ahmed, one of our Muslim boarders – or, detainees, as we call them.
“Oh, Ahmed, I’m so sorry,” I said, pushing his handcuffed hands along the steel pipe from which his body was hanging, to remove his face from the path of the spray. “I got so caught up in the beauty of the Cuban sky that I didn’t realize I was pissing into a circuitous air duct that leads directly to your room!”
“Oh, that is quite all right,” said Ahmed calmly, thanking me with his eyes for moving him out of the pee-pee wind. “But would you mind moving my Koran out of the way of that drip? One of our rules about the Koran is that you can’t get urine on it. And Infidel pee is, like, the worst.”
I looked down and saw the unfortunate book soaking in a widening puddle.
“Oh, Ahmed, I am so sorry!” I said, nudging the Koran out of the urine with my foot so as not to get any pee on me.
“NOT with your foot!” Sputtered Ahmed, his body squirming as if electrodes were attached to his testicles. He calmed down, smiled and said apologetically, “Another one of our rules.”
I found a broom handle laying on the floor and used that to push the book instead of my foot.
“Thank you,” Ahmed said. “I would offer you tea, but I’m a bit indisposed at the moment.” He gestured with his eyes towards the handcuffs.
“Oh, that’s all right,” I said. “I can’t stay anyway. I’ve got to immediately go report myself to my superior officer so we can get this instance of Koran Abuse documented. We’ve got our rules, too, you know.”
Ahmed gave me a knowing look and off I went.
Needless to say, my superior officer was pretty, well, pissed, when he heard what I’d done.
“Lotta goddamned paperwork,” he muttered as he started typing. “You didn’t flush the god damned thing down the toilet, did you?”
“Uh, the cells don’t have flush toilets, sir,” I said.
“Oh yeah, that’s right. Good. Good. That’s what they really get touchy about, is when we flush the god damned things down the toilet.”
I stood there for a minute waiting for my punishment.
“At ease, private,” said my superior officer. “What you’ve done is wrong. But you’re just a mentally retarded hillbillly from West Virginia. You can’t be expected to be an expert in Comparative Religions. We’re gonna have to put you in Time Out for a while to show the Muslim world that we take this shit seriously. But don’t worry. You’ll be back on duty in no time.”
“Thank you, sir,” I said, saluting. I turned to leave.
“Private!” Said my superior officer. “One more thing.”
“Yes, sir?”
“Next time you gotta take a leak, use the head like everybody else.”
Army life is tough. But I wouldn’t trade the experiences I’ve had here for anything.
that’s truly inspired writing but lets hope it doesn’t get into the wrong hands or this just might be the next excuse we hear from the Pentagon…and no I’m not really joking.
The US has been abusing, torturing, disappearing, and killing Muslims and others unfortunate enough to be in the way of their ambitions. If the Koran incidents are what set the victim side off, peace be with them. But I think we need to keep the focus on the real stuff and remember that this is just one, relatively minor, instance of much more substantial wrongdoing.
We’re being conned into buying the idea that the riots and protests were just about the Koran and not reaction to an imperialist war that currently afflicts Muslim nations. The hatred for American behavior is no more about the Koran-in-the-toilet story than the American Revolution was about a tea tax.
I have no respect for fundamentalists here, so I can’t be getting all weepy about their counterparts there, either. The Koran violations were stupid and obviously harmful to the American oil dream, but if people got over all the emotion about old folklore the troubles wouldn’t happen. I’ll change my mind on this when somebody pisses on a copy of The Origin of Species or Das Kapital or Lord of the Rings and we get bloody riots by rationalists or commies or D&D nerds.
“I didn’t inhale!”
“I voted for it before I voted against it!”
Yes I pissed on the koran but it was an accident.
I killed tens of thousands of civilians in Fallujah, but they were all terrorists.
I tortured, raped and murdered my way through Abu Ghraib and Guantanamo, but they deserved it because they were terrorists trying to harm America.
I stole all the Iraqi construction money and I need more.
I lied about the reasons for war, but Saddam wore a black hat so he was a bad guy.
I aint telling nobody how many living brain dead troops there are returning, but hey they didn’t die.
I deliberatley targetted doctors but they would have only treated terrorists.
Etc Etc ad nauseum
Yes America’s glorious present, and it wont look much better in the history books.