by Patrick Lang (bio below)
A serving officer in the US Army recently authored this piece…
“Dateline: Baghdad -March 3, 2010 (I). CNN International closed its Baghdad Bureau today, as violence in Iraq reached a level never imaginable only four years ago. After the last American helicopter left the Green Zone in December, 2006, the shaky central Iraqi government has been on the verge of collapse. When the Americans left in 2006 due to domestic political pressure, they left the Iraqi Army with effective combat units, but ineffective logistics and support. Because of this, the Iraqi government could not project power very far outside of the capitol.
Immediately after the American “Strategic Redeployment,” Terror leader Abu Musab al-Zarqawi rallied his foreign jihadist forces and launched effective guerilla raids across northern Iraq. This rash of attacks elevated Zarqawi to folk-hero status among the Sunnis, now seen as the man that stood up to the superpower and won. Zarqawi’s forces established a staging area in the Anbar Province, and promptly declared the small landlocked area ‘The Holy Islamic Republic of Iraq” and immediately petitioned the UN for official recognition.
In the south, Shia Arabs became increasingly wary of the central government, which they viewed as a puppet of American interests and corrupt. This was due to the infiltration of Iranian intelligence agents and the increase of Iran-friendly Imams in community mosques.
The Baghdad government seemed powerless to stop any of the developments. With Zarqawi’s IED-makers safe in the Anbar Province, any attempt to transport troops from Baghdad met with ambushes and mass casualties. The Iraqi government petitioned the UN for peacekeepers, the EU for funding and military trainers, and the US for an expeditionary force. All fell on deaf ears.
In late 2008, Zarqawi launched a major assault on Baghdad, which many in America saw as the Iraqi “Tet Offensive.” During this assault, Zarqawi’s forces briefly controlled the Green Zone, where they hunted down all westerners they could find and over the next 3 weeks decapitated them on the internet. Zarqawi- formerly a petty thief in Jordan- had now risen to become a revolutionary war leader. After the government regained control of Baghdad, the Iraqi president directly appealed to US President Howard Dean for help in dealing with Zarqawi. President Dean conferred with UN Secretary General Bill Clinton, and cited Clinton’s decision not to accept Bin Laden from the Sudanese in the ‘90’s as precedent for their inaction. Citing problems with “international law,” American forces were not ordered to act against Zarqawi, who was now making public appearances as a head of state.
At the same time, the northern Kurds, who had stayed out of the Sunni-Shia conflict for two years, saw that the weakening Baghdad government would not be able to protect them in the future. Proclaiming their province “The Federal Republic of Kurdistan,” independence was declared, as was solidarity with their neighbors in Turkey. This immediately instigated Turkish military incursions into Kurdish territory.
It was at this time, that the real problems started. In January,2009, Iranian troops, tanks, and SCUD launchers crossed the southern border into Shia towns, and were greeted by cheering crowds. …
continued below, along with the second, alternate report, “Dateline: Baghdad -March 3, 2010 (II),” which begins, “President George Allen attended a joint session of the Federal Republic of Iraq’s parliament today ….“
Dateline: Baghdad -March 3, 2010 (I), continued:
The Iranian president cited “the instability of the American puppet government” as justification for his intervention. After regaining control of southern Iraq to the border with Kuwait, he was nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize. In Saudi Arabia, meanwhile, mosques across the kingdom declared solidarity with The Holy Islamic Republic of Iraq. This immediately triggered violent riots in the streets of Rihad, which caused the Royal family to flee to Paris for their lives. Saudi Arabia was plunged into anarchy, with many communities now looking to their radicalized wahabbist mosques for leadership. Syria experienced similar problems with radicalism, but handled it differently. As towns near the Iraqi border began an insurrection against the Syrian government, President Assad moved his military in to quell the riots. A total of 9 towns were shelled by Syrian heavy artillery, killing more than 22,000 people. Rumors that chemical munitions were used have not been substantiated.
All of this preceded the level of violence occurring the last three months, with “cleansing” raids being done daily by Zarqawi’s Holy Islamic Army. No one is sure of the amount of civilians killed- mainly for participation in past elections- but estimates range well above 100,000.
CNN International’s Baghdad bureau was the last to leave the tattered, war-torn city now facing a very uncertain future.
**********************************
Dateline: Baghdad -March 3, 2010 (II) President George Allen attended a joint session of the Federal Republic of Iraq’s parliament today, marking the formal hand-over of counter-insurgency operations to the Iraqi government. This came after last week’s re-location of the Coalition forces form the Green Zone to the newly constructed Victory Army Airfield and Maneuver Training Center near the Syrian border. There was little violence across the country to mark the affair, although Al- Qaida in Iraq issued an internet statement declaring the government “illegitimate.”
Iraqi President and war hero Muhhamed Fariq was in attendance, publicly thanking the American people for their commitment to freedom for the people in Iraq. President Fariq quickly achieved folk-hero status in 2006, when a commando battalion led by him captured terror leader Abu Musab Al-Zarqawi. Known as the “catcher of thieves,” Fariq became a symbol of hope in the new Iraq, and quickly rose to power when he retired from the military and joined the parliament. Hollywood is planning a feature film on Fariq’s life, which will make it the 20th pro-war film since 2006.
Economically, the Federal Republic of Iraq quickly outshined its neighbors. Due to investment in infrastructure by Haliburton, Chinese, and Russian firms- Iraq’s oil industry brings in robust profits. Partnering with an American advertising firm, the Iraqi government now markets to educated people across the Arab world. The slogan “Iskun fee Iraq”(I live in Iraq) is broadcast to draw architects, doctors, engineers, and teachers to Iraq. So far the visa office in Baghdad has a backlog of thousands.
To counter the increased immigration in Iraq, as well as its economic success, many Arab countries have implemented democratic reforms. Elections in Jordan, Lebanon, Egypt, and Libya have led to an increase in the freedom ratings across the region. The Saudi Arabian government has formally invited President Allen to the first session of its parliament in April.
The Iraqi Army, now set to take full control of counter-insurgency operations, will be backed up by a division of US troops based far from Baghdad. The 2nd Infantry Division, long based in South Korea, will be the first division to occupy the headquarters, serving primarily as a QRF for the region. Iran, still pursuing nuclear weapons after NATO commando incursions in 2006 that seriously damaged their infrastructure, remains a threat in the region. Radical Islam remains a threat in the region as well, but driving the terrorists from any possible shelter in Iraq and Afghanistan has mitigated the threat to a manageable level. The region will no doubt see violence in the future, but for the first time, there seems to be hope on the Arab street.”
(A serving officer in the US Army recently authored this piece. — Pat Lang)
Col. Patrick W. Lang (Ret.), a highly decorated retired senior officer of U.S. Military Intelligence and U.S. Army Special Forces, served as “Defense Intelligence Officer for the Middle East, South Asia and Terrorism” for the Defense Intelligence Agency (DIA) and was later the first Director of the Defense Humint Service. Col. Lang was the first Professor of the Arabic Language at the United States Military Academy at West Point. For his service in the DIA, he was awarded the “Presidential Rank of Distinguished Executive.” He is a frequent commentator on television and radio, including MSNBC’s Countdown with Keith Olbermann (interview), CNN and Wolf Blitzer’s Situation Room (interview), PBS’s Newshour, NPR’s “All Things Considered,” (interview), and more .
Personal Blog: Sic Semper Tyrannis 2005 || Bio || CV
Recommended Books || More BooTrib Posts
Novel: The Butcher’s Cleaver (download free by chapter, PDF format)
“Drinking the Kool-Aid,” Middle East Policy Council Journal, Vol. XI, Summer 2004, No. 2
Those are a couple of good examples of pure fantasy. A war gamer’s orgasmic exercise…nice.
As if Dean would ever ascend to the presidency with the DEM establishment undercutting him at every turn.
I presume this officer is sees the second scenario as more desirable? Stay the course, blah blah blaaaa.
Hey Lang,
Talk to us about our 10-15 permanent bases there. I think we will not vacate them PERIOD.
We can draw down to 20-30K of troops, but I believe we will be holed up in them no matter what is going on outside.
“President George Allen.”
Shoot me now, please.
Truly.
But don’t shoot yourself should it happen … come on up here, and we’ll swim to Canada.
(Since passports will be required by then to go for a fucking day trip to Victoria from here, we may have to swim. The Canadians may be on high alert, besieged by applications from desperate Americans trying to get out of the country.)
Reagan, Dubya, Allen seems like the correct trajectory for the dumbing down of America.
Sad to say, I suspect George Allen, (the second dumbest guy in DC after “you know who”), is the most likely one to be elected prez in 2008. McCain will steadily become more and more scary as his true pathology breaks through his facade of rationality, and, as yet, I really don’t see any worthwhile Dems with a meaningful chance. Allen is dumb but pliable, and you can be sure the neocons will be looking for such a creature to continue in the footspes of their previous imbecile Bush. Only a complete fool can help their cause and Allen is perfect for the task.
to the army oficer who wrote this peice, and he certainly has earned the right to his opinion, but….
I don’t think that the horrific visions in “version one” of this story would be mitigated simply by the election of a Republican President and the “end of anti-war debate” brought on by a “bi-partisan” agreement to support the war led by John Kerry.
The author seems to have an inverted idea of the causation of what he terms the “Iraq Problem”. The problems in Iraq are not caused by the “anti-war” debate… the debate is caused by the problems in Iraq.
Although it would be nice (in the authors opinion) if all the whiny liberals would just shut their pie holes, get behind their President, and support his efforts to “democratize” Iraq. It wouldn’t matter one iota in the big picture for the future of that country if they did.
Also one question…..Haliburton? Responsible for an economic miracle in Iraq? I know this piece was fictional, but was the author really trying for satire?
Excellent, rational rebuttle.
I haven’t read it all yet. I don’t mind reading other POVs, but think we have the right to counter them with our own POVs.
For starters, it’s good intellectual exercise.
I can’t believe I just typed rebuttle…. it’s the cold medicine, I swear!
change his hardline anti-comment editing stance.
Especially during cold and flu season.
at heart I’m just a fascist 😉
I think you collect them and chortle over them, show them to friends and neighbors so they can point and laugh, and are secretly saving them up for a book: The Joy of Humiliating the Typing Impaired.
Truth time: I could have fixed it (cuz I can delete posts), but was too lazy.
Now I’m taking some homeopathic shit that Darcy said I just have to try. It’s holistically named –and doesn’t this make you think of butterflies and rainbows?! — “ColdCalm.”
In version 1 of the story the author forgot to mention how Secretary of State Barbra Streisand and Sec. of Defense Michael Moore all met with Clinton at Sean Penn’s house to discuss how much they really hate America and wish it was more like France.
You are a SCREAM.
I hope someone goes on with this riff … love it …
Sean Penn’s house — ROFLMAO
That’s already happened. 3000% up since the crusade began.
That’s an even bigger economic miracle than google.
Why, Ducky!
Are you saying that it’s all about the money?
Duelling fantasies. It’s hard to see where any sort of responsible, comprehensive fact-based analysis plays a prominent role in either of these evaluations.
It may be that the biggest fantasy seen here is that the legitimate Iraq government wants the US to stay:
Iraq Declaration of Independence Signed by Major Parties, Chalabi
Not trying to re-open a dkos/BT can of worms, just noticed it posted there and not mentioned anywhere else.