Here’s my favorite Christmas Carol. What’s yours?
At our Christmas party
We were drinkin’ champagne punch
And homemade eggnog
Little sister brought her new boyfriend
He was a Mexican
We didn’t know what to think of him
‘Til he sang Feliz Navidad
Feliz Navidad
Brother Ken brought his kids with him
The three from his first wife Lynn
And the two identical twins
From his second wife MaryNell
Of course he brought his new wife Kaye
Who talks all about AA
Chain smokin’ while the stereo plays
Noel, Noel, The first Noel
Carve the turkey turn the ball game on
Mix margaritas when the eggnog’s gone
Send somebody to the Quik-Pak store
We need some ice and an extension cord
A can of bean dip and some Diet Rite
A box of tampons and some Marlboro Lights
Hallelujah everybody say cheese
Merry Christmas from the family
Fran and Rita drove from Harlingen
I can’t remember how I’m kin to them
But when they tried to plug their motorhome in
They blew our Christmas lights
Cousin David knew just what went wrong
So we all waited on our front lawn
He threw the breaker and the lights came on
And we sang Silent Night
Oh Silent Night
Carve the turkey turn the ball game on
Mix margaritas when the eggnog’s gone
Send somebody to the Quik-Pak store
We need some ice and an extension cord
A can of bean dip and some Diet Rite
A box of tampons and some Marlboro Lights
Hallelujah everybody say cheese
Merry Christmas from the family
Carve the turkey turn the ballgame on
Make Bloody Marys cause we all want one
Send somebody to the Stop ‘n Go
We need some celery and a can of fake snow
A bag of lemons and some Dite Sprite
A box of tampons and some Salem Lights
Hallelujah everybody say cheese
Merry Christmas from the family
Feliz Navidad
OF COURSE it is the best Christmas song ever. But aren’t you even going to say whose it is? Sheesh.
Robert Earl Keen. Merry Christmas from the Family.
Still wondering about this, btw.
And, A Bigger Bang is excellent.
Thanks Janet. I mistakenly guessed that the writer was John Prine. (The lyrics have something very Prine-like about them.)
Season’s greetings and all my best!
The Pogues singing Fairytale of New York
[…]
They’ve got cars big as bars
They’ve got rivers of gold
But the wind goes right through you
It’s no place for the old
When you first took my hand
On a cold Christmas Eve
You promised me
Broadway was waiting for me
You were handsome
You were pretty
Queen of New York City
When the band finished playing
They howled out for more
Sinatra was swinging,
All the drunks they were singing
We kissed on a corner
Then danced through the night
The boys of the NYPD choir
Were singing “Galway Bay”
And the bells were ringing out
For Christmas day
…
You know the Pogues! Have a 4 for my favorite group- because I can’t give you five green queens.
The Pogues are excellent!
As I type this I’m listening to Doctor Demento playing “Fairytale of New York.” He says the song was recently voted Britain’s all-time favorite Christmas song. I don’t have any reason to doubt him, but I have to wonder who took the poll, and who they polled.
It’s a good song, though. I’d never heard it before. The lyrics caught my ear because of Sybil’s original post, I came back to look, and yep, that was the song. Amazing what you hear on Doctor Demento sometimes — he doesn’t stick to Weird Al clones. He has a graduate degree in musicology and I love when he does a little bit of education with his entertainment.
in a British poll of 100 best songs. [Google]
That seems more of a likely story.
Deck us all with Boston Charlie written by Walt Kelly of pogo fame, made famous(?) by Lambert, Hendricks and Ross
Sung to the tune of “Deck the Halls”:
Lovely…brings tears to me eyes.
Peace and Blessings
for reminding me of the best political comic strip ever.
Without a doubt, Darlene Love singing Christmas, Baby Please Come Home. Just watched the annual performance on Letterman and, as always, it was excellent!
Only Eartha could sing this:
Santa Baby, forgot to mention one little thing
A ring
I don’t mean on the phone
Santa Baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight
Hurry down the chimney tonight
Hurry…tonight
That’s a favorite around here…just imagine the sight of two little boys trimming the tree, singing along with Eartha in their best Eartha voices.
I have John Prine’s “Christmas in Prison” stuck in my head this morning…
I bet that’s an “edgy” Christmas song, right? 😉
I’ll look it up, thanks.
I also love Elvis singing “Blue Christmas” especially the “bloo-bloo-bloo” part.
.
Remembrance from childhood: “Oh Tannenbaum” and the Dutch carol “de herdertjes lagen bij nachte“.
Oh Tannenbaum, oh Tannenbaum,
wie grün sind deine Blätter!
Du grünst nicht nur zur Sommerszeit,
nein auch im Winter, wenn es schneit
Oh Tannenbaum, oh Tannenbaum,
wie grün sind deine Blätter!
Oh Tannenbaum, oh Tannenbaum,
du kannst mir sehr gefallen!
Wie oft hat nicht zur Weihnachtszeit,
ein Baum von dir mich hoch erfreut.
Oh Tannenbaum, oh Tannenbaum,
du kannst mir sehr gefallen!
Oh Tannenbaum, oh Tannenbaum,
dein Kleid will mich was lehren:
Die Hoffnung und Beständigkeit
gibt Trost und Kraft zu jeder Zeit.
Oh Tannenbaum, oh Tannenbaum,
dein Kleid will mich was lehren.
Wiener Sängerknaben
Have a Joyous and Inspiring Christmas day with all your loved ones nearby. We need to come together in our own circle of friends and family, to find the strength and faith to attack all evil in a very important NEW YEAR 2006!
Each and every candle I will light during the holidays, will be a reminder of all friends and other frogs here in the pond.
PEACE be to all!
“Treason doth never prosper: what’s the reason?
For if it prosper, none dare call it treason.”
▼ ▼ ▼ MY DIARY
Inspired after hearing Nat King Cole’s, uh, courageous attempt at singing “Oh Tannenbaum” in German, I asked my German wife to teach me the lyrics. She could only remember the first verse!
I was incredulous. “How can you not remember ‘Oh Tannenbaum’?” She said that her carol-singing days were a long time ago. Still…
By the way, you should check out Nat’s attempt if you don’t already know it. “Wie oft hat nicht” alone is worth the price of the CD if you value hilarity.
Especially when done by the great rich voice of the mighty Clarence Carter:
“They call me the Back Door Santa
I make my runs about the break of day
they call me the Back Door Santa
I make my runs about the break of day
I make all the little girls happy, while the boys are out to play
I ain’t like old Saint Nick, he don’t come but once a year
I ain’t like old Saint Nick, he don’t come but once a year
I come runnin with my presents, every time they call me dear
I keep some change in my pocket
I chase the children from home
I give them a few pennies so we could be alone
I leave the back door open so if anybody smells the mouse
and wouldn’t old santa be in trouble if there ain’t a chimney in the house
They call me the Back Door Santa
I make my runs about the break of day
They call me the Back Door Santa
I make my runs about the break of day
I make all the little girls happy, while all the boys go out to play
They call me Back Door Santa
Yeah that’s what they call me
They call me the Back Door Santa
yeah that’s what they call me”
I wrote this when in High School.
Good Queen Wenslas, she looked out,
On the feast of Stephen,
When the snow lay all about,
Deep and crisp and even.
Greatly she was bored that night,
And the frost was cruel.
Till a poor man came insight
Drinking winter gruel.
Bad Queen Wenslass she went out,
gathered up the old man.
Brought him in unto the fire,
warmed him, turned him on, man.
Kept him busy all that night,
Thou his heart was weakly,
Morning found him lying near,
Shriveled up with fear.
Worse Queen Wenslas she gave birth
To a six pound baby.
Royal looked he not at all,
Made her wonder maybe.
Fast she went unto the night,
To the old man’s hamlet,
Asked him if he’d take the babe,
he told her to cram it.
The stockings all hung by the balcony with care
In hopes that atall dark and handsome man will appear…
When out on the pool deck there arose such a ruckus
With my luck its only Dick Butkus.
Looking forward to the family coming to my place for dinner and presents tomorrow night. My ex always comesout from Tucson(we are lucky to remain very good friends). Never have to devide time with the grandleezy! She will be nine next month. Grandpa has been sent to the store every year and a few minutes later Santa appears. It has been pricelss. Now she is starting to question why Grandpa never gets to see Santa. We think she is on to us. Oh the loss of innocense. Christmas day is spent at my son’s home. I really look forward to this holiday.
I will be quite busy as you can see for the next two days. I would like to take this opportunity to wish each and everyone of you the warmth and love of the season today and always. You all have enriched my life and have made me a better person for knowing you.
Happy, Merry Everything!
And good will to all frogs
cats, birds, squirrels and dogs.
love and homemade cookies
All the best to all y’all
Good Morning ya,ll, from the great state of TN. I am going to get ready here in a few minutes to go to work. Like I said I am on call all month long and ppl do get sick year round. Since this is Saturday and part of a w/e and Christmas Eve, I am going in a little later than normal. I wanted to drop by and say Merry Christmas to each of you. I love all Christmas music. All kinds. I have only one prayer this year for Christmas, and that is to see great things done to stop the madness of war and injustice all over the world. I have this recurring dream of peace everywhere. I know it is only a dream, but it is the best dream I have ever had.
I love you all lots. I wish the best for you, not only on Christmas, but year round.
BTW, I am going to be going to my daughters on Monday for our family Christmas. Since my son, the cop, is not off till then, we will work around his schedule this year instead of mine. I have warned all of concerned persons, not to bother me from 1000 to 1800 hours. I will be for others after that but those 6-8 hours are mine….;o)
You each are in my thoughts as always, have a great day…..
I heard that song the first time just yesterday on the essential WMNF in Tampa. Oh, God! How it captures just about every family I know. (Including my very own, of course.)
May peace, hope and joy be yours and may goodness triumph.
…still goes to “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch”.
Every Christmas song should have a line like: “Your soul is an appalling dumpheap, overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable, mangled up … in tangled up knots!”
Next year I think I’ll have a batch of cards printed up with that as the message — for certain selected recipients (nobody here!).
“Dear Mr. President…”
I will always remember giggling wildly with my friends at C’mas time everywhere when we shockingly sang,
“We three kings of orient are,
Tried to smoke a rubber cigar …”
Signs of the times:
We felt terribly naughty singing that, and our parents would feign displeasure.
of when we kids used to sing,
“Santa roasting on an open fire,
Jack Frost nipping at your booze…”
Good times, those.
One of my favorite Christmas recordings is of Spinal Tap doing “We Three Kings.” They mumble and stumble over the words for about a minute or so, then end up doing the “chewing on a rubber cigar” version.
Another of my favorites is the medieval carol “Riu riu chiu” done by . . . wait for it — The Monkees, a capella! I play it for people and it they know the Monkees at all it takes them a minute to wrap their ears around the idea, and then they go, “Oh yeah!!” People don’t always realize that in addition to being the “Prefab Four,” the Monkees were all pretty good musicians in their own right.
SOME PEOPLE (!) put up beautiful Christmas carols on their blogs.
I just learned how to play Blue Xmas on the ukelele (after a fashion) to surprise my family tonight. One of my all-time favorites is Xmas in Jail by the Youngsters (1954). When I went looking for it to download for a coworker who actually is in jail I also found a blues song by the same name.
The Robert Earl Keen song is tops for the Christmas cynics around here. But we also like James McMurtry’s Holiday (check out his music!):
The in-laws are waiting the games have begun
The cell phone keeps ringing “don’t answer it hon”
The whole thing’s arranged just to aggravate Dad
And it’s amateur day on the old super slab
The kids are strapped down like a half load of pipe
All safe in their car seats they fuss and they gripe
Well you can’t hardly blame `em it must be a bitchCounting the crosses off down in the ditch
This one’s got flowers, this one’s got a wreath
This one’s got a name painted down underneath
Was the road all iced up, were they going too fast
Here’s five in a circle left from the last holiday
Holiday
There’s a three-trailer rig just a throwin’ up spray
Not legal to run on this kind of a day
But god damn the smokies and the four wheelers too
Stay offa my bumpers or the same goes for you
There’ll be none for him
He that wants it the most
As he hauls it on out to the Oregon coast
No turkey no gravy no Zinfandel wine
You just stay over right and we’ll get along fine
He’s missing the football, missing the fun
He’d play with the grandkids but he’s off on a run
And some hat’s on the radio singing his song
But it don’t make a damn
He’s in for a long holiday
Holiday
Now granny she’s yelling
She’s ready to eat
She’s havin’ conniptions
`Cause they won’t take their seats
But she’s got `em all gathered now under one roof
With her camcorder loaded
She’s gonna get proof
But do you have to wear that
Well I just don’t see why
Please pass the potatoesAw eat shit and die
Did you hear about Ellen, she’s leaving, you know
How `bout those Packers, think it’ll snow?
And the minute it’s over they’ll scatter like quail
Off down the freeway in the teeth of a gale
Silent and shattered And numb to the core
They count themselves lucky
They got through one more holiday
Holiday
The highway patrolman
He stands in the rain
He just lets it run down to soften the stain
Of the blood on his pant leg
From working that wreck
And he won’t forget it
In time for the next holiday
Departing Chicago at 9:52
In clean desert camo all baggy and loose
Sits an Iowa Guardsman alone by the gate
The place sure looked different, in 1968
When he traveled with mom, first time on a plane
To visit some kin, he’s forgotten their names
But he remembers the soldiers, still in their teensIn their spit polished boots and their pressed army greens
With the creases so sharp, and their faces so smooth
But their eyes looked so heavy, he wondered how they could move
Now he’s got that same look, like his insides are black
He’s in his mid forties and he has to go backAnd he can’t even smoke while he waits for his plane
The uniform’s different, but the mission remains
To do like they tell you, don’t make a fuss
Why’s not an issue, so don’t think too much
You just do what you have to, shut up and drive
If you come apart later, well at least you’re alive
You can get you some help, you can deal with it then
And life will be better, `til it happens again
`Cause there’s something inside us that won’t let us be
It stalks through our days `til it’s too dark to see
And it’s damn near as deadly as Texans on ice
Lord don’t they beat all
Y’all have a nice holiday
i’ll have a blue xanax
to make it
i’ll need a green prosac
just to fake it
holidays are the wost
‘cuz my family i hate
i’ll be alright, dear,
if i just self-medicate
and when those red valium
start workin’
i’ll pop an orange librium
for smirkin’
you’ll be doing all right
with your wine, red or white
but i’ll have a blue, blue blue blue xanax.