Yeah, so? The first of many posts to come …. my face is painted blue (bless ya, brother Mel Gibson, for the war paint) … the day of reckonin’ is comin’. The HBO sports guys voted for the Steelers 3 to 1. haruuummmph.
My next-door neighbor — let me tell you, he’s really for the birds! — sent me another joke. You know what his jokes are like. Corny, like him. But this one shows WHICH SIDE God is on this Sunday! … below the fold … OPEN THREAD …
Now we know who’s side he’s on.
Terry Bradshaw, after living a full life, died. When he got to heaven, God
was showing him around. They came to a modest little house with a faded
Steelers flag in the window.
“This house is yours for eternity, Terry.” said God.
“This is very special; not everyone gets a house up here.”
Bradshaw felt special, indeed, and walked up to his house. On his way up
the porch, he noticed another house just around the corner. It was a 3
story mansion with a blue and white sidewalk, a 50 foot tall flag pole with
an enormous SEAHAWKS flag, and in every window a blue Towel.
Bradshaw looked at God and said, “God, I’m not trying to be ungrateful, but
I have a question. I was an all-pro quarterback, I hold many NFL records,
and I even went to the Hall of Fame.”
God said, “So what’s your point Bradshaw?”
“Well, why does Matt Hasselbeck get a better house than me?”
God chuckled, and said, “Terry, that’s not Matt’s house, it’s mine.”
What??? God is not an Anarchist??? What gives him the right to a better house than Terry Bradshaw?
How many passes has God completed? Let’s see God’s stats!!
Has Heaven been taken over by the CORPORATIONS??? Where mere STATUS determines your rewards??? God puts his pants on one leg at a time just like the rest of us!! [OK. That may have been too gender-specific. What it the equivalent saying for women? God could, just possibly, be female, of course.]
What???? God is a CAT??? No!!! Wait!!! Alright!! Back to basics. What are God’s stats? Why does he – she – it rate a better house that Terry Bradshaw??
Corporate Status, right?
Rick, in your rather extreeeeeeeeeeme hysteria and rather PATHETIC BIAS for the Steelers and Bradshaw, you forgot the key point of the joke: God is a Seahawk fan and has blessed them for Sunday’s game.
It’s sad, Rick. Sad.
Of course, the English always beat the Picts in the long run, don’t they?
If you live in Texas for any length of time you see a bumper sticker that says:
They take their football seriously down there. Shows you exactly what Texas’ business community thought of His Nibs; they put him in charge of a baseball team instead of a football team. He would have screwed up the football team. (I still don’t understand how Chimpy can carry the vote in a state where he traded away Sammy Sosa.)
That’s because Texas is a Football State.
Where I taught school there in the not so ancient past, they had a league for 3rd graders. None of this light-in-the-loafers stuff like coed flag football such as my 5th graders had in our official “school” league, either. This was genuine tackle football, complete with full pads, helmets, uniforms, etc., the outfit run by the rabid footballing dads. Boys only, of course.
No blankety-blank ex-cheerleader is gonna be put in charge of important stuff like that!
Today, as I walked out of the downtown main library in Detroit, I saw a male of the species with green hair and blue painted across his eyes. (Sorry Susan, not his entire face, but sort of a “lone ranger” mask only in lovely sky-blue). That’s the first one. Too bad I don’t carry a camera at work.
Guess he was attracted to the momentary clear blue sky we had for a bit of time.
That marks the guy as a transplant at best, an outsider at worst. Real Seattlites don’t like it when the sky turns blue. It means the rain is going away. Last time that happened things started getting dry and the webs between my toes started cracking something fierce.
Besides, when the clouds go away we have to do deal with that weird yellow ball up in the sky. Please don’t ask us about that.
No, really, please don’t ask. We don’t know what it is. We only see it two or three times a year.
Best of luck Susan. I bet my Rep. sis a five spot and I have the Seahawks.
And the week is flying by. Is there something you meant to do this week but haven’t? Maybe Just 4 Today, you could do it?
Would it help to tell someone about it at Eat4Today?
Just wanted to let everyone who is interested know that I just got off the phone from Senator Kennedy’s office and I’m trying to get access to a detailed explanation of his health care proposal. I have to call back this afternoon to speak to the next person up the food chain, but they tried to direct me to the right websites. The two staffers who I spoke to sounded enthused that we are interested in pushing Kennedy’s plan. Hey, it’s worth the time and effort to prove that Democrats DO have a better way.
but I wouldn’t be upset if Pittsburgh wins…hell, the Penguins suck so bad (and let’s not even start with the pathetic Pirates) that the sports fans there need something to smile about…
My best persuasive argument: We’ve never won, and they’ve won four times.
P.S. HBO did a nice piece on the two Samoan players, one on each team…. and showed gorgeous footage of Samoa, and the Samoan communities in the U.S.
It suddenly occurs to me that in my Seattle office of about 60 people, there is not an emblem of the Seagulls anywhere to be seen. Pics of people’s gay spouses on their desks, yes, and a few No Iraq War signs attached to cubicle walls… but the Gulls? And at the water cooler, not a word spoke yet about this coming Sunday (erm, it is THIS Sunday, right?).
Now, there are two ospreys that live somewhere near our building. Them’s the real seahawks.
Oh, I totally get it.
Your office is too hip and too cool to digress about the brutal, Neanderthal game of football.
Now, up here in podunk country, everybody is NUTSO loud about it! Lots of businesses have signs up! People are wearing their Seahawk sweatshirts to COSTCO. Etc.
No, we’re not hip or cool, we’re just geeks. Today I read one the best perspectives I’ve seen on the city’s attitude, and ironically, it’s written by a Pittsburg paper.
A little history about Seattle being too hip and cool for sports …
Back in 1990, I got ALL excited because the Goodwill Games were coming to Seattle. (I lived there then, in fact in the U-District where a long walk would get me to the track and field events.)
I was so astonished to read the newspapers and see how many Seattleites deplored the games and vowed to leave town.
Well, I went with my corny excitement, and bought tickets … then, I found out when the games had started, that so many people had left Seattle for the week that it was easy to get GREAT seats at most of the events from people outside selling the tickets they’d been given free.
We had the most fabulous week. I took 8-year-old Darcy to the Opening Ceremonies, and every night, at about 5pm, we walked to Husky Stadium and we watched every track and field event … we saw all the greats …. Jacky Joyner, Carl Lewis, and on and on … the place was maybe 1/8 full, which I found very sad. But it was cool for us because we got to buy cheap seats and scoot down to get great views.
We also went to the synchronized swimming, and my cousin’s daughter took Darcy to the ice skating competitions in Tacoma — with the great, great Russian ice skaters ALL competing.
My cousin’s husband — who just died two weeks ago of liver cancer — and I hit the streets. We got Gold Medal Men’s Basketball Championship tickets — $50 seats for $10 each. And we had a blast!
Little Darcy insisted on buying a Soviet flag, and she rooted for the USSR women’s basketball team — against the great U.S. women!
And, culturally, it was marvelous.
I’d never seen, in person, a huge collection of Brazlians rooting for their team! They are the wildest, MOST FUN group of people ever!
Wilt Chamberlain sat two seats below me at the semi-finals of the mens’ basketball — with his blonde girlfriend — and I saw him with her a couple more times (laying at risk his claim of how many women he’d been with in his life).
We were incredibly TOUCHED by the stories of the POOR Russian athletes who sold their uniforms to eager Americans so they could get some cash and buy VCRs, etc. to take back home — because they couldn’t get such things at home.
I’m really digressing .. but, sometimes, it’s fun to get corny and get into sports.
You must’ve not been the one always chosen last for the teams in P.E. Actually, though, now that I think about it, I am a little surprised that, with all the gay men here, the synchronized swimming events at the Games weren’t sold out for months in advance.
I was ALWAYS chosen last for the teams … I never could do a handstand, a cartwheel, etc., etc. … I was hopelessly unathletic … very, very depressing.
And my muscle weakness is one reason I think that my arthritis hit me harder than it might other people.
But I’ve always loved superb athletic display — in my mind, I’m them, I’m doing it just like them … it’s a fantasy thing.
Hvae you ever gone to the Univ of Washington women’s basketball games? Many years ago, when I took little Darcy and her friends all the time, the place was a regular lesbian pick-up joint! I got a kick out of it….
Other dedicated fans included men who were sick of the slam dunks in men’s basketball and were traditionalists about the game.
Sorry Susan, but you’re misinformed. Last time I chatted with God–I think it was at last year’s Captain Future Convention—somebody mentioned the Seahawks. “Seattle has a team?” quoth God. “I should get to this corner of the galaxy more often. How are the Steelers doing?”