The compensation we get for having to witness the absolute decimation of our country is the occasional schadenfreude that is on offer. To wit:

A criminal investigation of Mr. Giuliani raises the stakes of the Ukraine scandal for the president, whose dealings with the country are already the subject of an impeachment inquiry. It is also a stark turn for Mr. Giuliani, who now finds himself under scrutiny from the same United States attorney’s office he led in the 1980s, when he first rose to prominence as a tough-on-crime prosecutor and later ascended to two terms as mayor of New York.

That piece of turnabout comes via the federal prosecutor’s office in the Southern District of New York.  If you grew up in the New York City metropolitan area, as I did, then you know why I can’t stop laughing.

Please know that Giuliani was the prosecutor there when La Cosa Nostra came to grief. New York’s five crime families have never been the same, and having an Italian-American prosecutor do the heavy lifting made it all seem like it was on the up and up.

But now Giuliani is embroiled in an international crime syndicate with Russian-backed thugs who specialize in “guaranteed fraud” and run a nightclub called Mafia Rave.

Lev Parnas and Igor Fruman, associates of Rudy Giuliani, were caught trying to flee the country Thursday and were arrested on campaign finance violations. But nobody anticipated the outrageous business names associated with the pair.

Fruman was associated with a club in Ukraine called Mafia Rave, and Parnas even has an easily navigable website, listing himself as co-founder and CEO of Fraud Guarantee, a fraud protection company.

This is too perfect all by itself, but it’s only the tippy top of the iceberg. Giuliani, after all, was acting in his capacity of personal attorney to the president of the United States. He chose for his associates people who are accused of funneling Russian money to American politicians. His exploits have damaged not only Trump but Vice-President Mike Pence, Secretary of State Mike Pompeo, Secretary of Energy Rick Perry, Attorney General William Barr, Florida governor Ron DeSantis, and lawmakers Sen. Rick Scott of Florida and House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy. It has even ruined former congressman and RNCC chairman Pete Sessions’ planned comeback.

And now Giuliani might go to jail for the simple reason that William Barr can’t seem to put a lid on the whole thing or control what the Southern District of New York wants to do.

Federal prosecutors in Manhattan are investigating whether President Trump’s personal lawyer Rudolph W. Giuliani broke lobbying laws in his dealings in Ukraine, according to two people familiar with the inquiry.

The investigators are examining Mr. Giuliani’s efforts to undermine the American ambassador to Ukraine, Marie L. Yovanovitch, one of the people said. She was recalled in the springas part of Mr. Trump’s broader campaign to pressure Ukraine into helping his political prospects.

Maybe the best part of it all is that Giuliani went on television and told everybody that he was about to embark for Ukraine and commit some crimes. He then did precisely what he had promised. They guy is a certified genius.

Anyone who has ever watched a spy show on television knows that Giuliani did everything wrong. Christ, he had lunch with these criminals on the same day they tried to flee the country rather than deliver their scheduled testimony to Congress. And they ate at the Trump Hotel in Washington. What kind of operational security is that?

But what do you expect from a man who made Bernie Kerik the police commissioner of New York City, went into private business with him and then convinced the Bush administration to name him as their nominee to head the Department of Homeland Security?

But fortunately Bernie Kerik can give Giuliani some useful advice, or at least tell him what to expect:

Convicted of false statements and tax charges relating to my children’s nanny and apartment renovations, I was sentenced to four years in federal prison, serving just over three years. I learned that the deprivation of freedom is far more profound than one can imagine, and that going to prison is like dying with your eyes open. A horrific experience for any American citizen.

Giuliani became a national hero on 9/11 at the exact time that the city was supposed to be selecting his replacement as mayor. Out of a job, he milked his newfound fame for all it was worth and became a homeland security consultant. That worked domestically for a while, but when Barack Obama became president, Giuliani had to look overseas for easy marks. Ukraine was obviously filled with just enough corruption for him to make big bucks, and so he hugged Trump as tightly as he could so he could market himself as a rainmaker in Kiev.

But he fucked it all up. Boy, did he fuck it up.

Who could have predicted?