When you spend four years of your life fighting for something and then you suddenly get it, it’s hard to know how to feel or what to do next. I’ve been waging war on Republicans for two decades now, but getting Trump out of office was a much higher stakes enterprise. Absolutely everything was on the line. Losing wasn’t something the world would recover from. For me, I would have had to find some other way to resist than writing, which also meant I’d need a new way to make a living.

The tension I’ve been under was so immense, I don’t think even I understand it. It’s been close to a life or death thing for me, so Election Night was excruciating as I waited for hopeful returns to show up.

Throughout this election cycle, I’ve endeavored to mix dispassionate analysis with advocacy for what I thought would best insure against possible disaster. On both counts, that led me to argue that Joe Biden could and would be the next president. I knew we needed Pennsylvania, and I knew he was the best bet to carry it. I’m skeptical that any of the eleventy billion other candidates could have accomplished it, but I won’t be argumentative on that point. I’m just grateful that I was right that Biden would get it done.

I wasn’t thrilled with the Kamala Harris pick on a strictly risk/benefit basis, but I’m ecstatic it worked out. It’s such a great feeling for a woman to finally reach such a high office, and she’ll be an inspiration to women and girls everywhere, in every country.

Whether Biden is a successful president or not, he and his clan are good people and they’ll make everybody better people, too. That’s what we need. That, above all, is what needed to change.

I’m just happy right now. Happy like someone who lived through a car wreck which should have been fatal.

One of my closest childhood friends died in a car wreck the Tuesday before the election, and I’m mourning his death fiercely. I know how chancy life can be, and we just dodged a bullet that would have ended our country and set the whole world on the precipice of chaos.

I’m going to relish this for a bit before I worry about what comes next.